Download Epub Format Ð Why Won’t You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts PDF by ß Harriet Lerner

Download Epub Format Ð Why Won’t You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts PDF by ß Harriet Lerner We ve all witnessed, or likely experienced firsthand, the power of an apology A sincere apology can repair damage done, while an insincere, or even absent apology, can cause further hurt that hits us harder than the deed that should be apologized for Harriet Lerner shows us how to compose an honest and heartfelt apology, receive an apology, and move forward in restoring our relationships Well worth the read Quick review for a quick read It took me around 4 or so hours to read through this thought provoking psychological read on the dissection of apologies Topics that Harriet Lerner approaches in this book include what constitutes an apology and what doesn t , what the types of apologies are, when and how to give them, why people don t give them, and the reception of apologies on a number of different levels I also like the fact that this narrative mentions that you don t need to forgive someone for a wrongdoing in order to move forward from it which is well intentioned advice, but not a one size fits all for every person and situation I like the fact that this book unpacks so many different scenarios with empathy, detail, cultural references, and application I didn t have previous expectations as to what to get out of this brief read, but it left me with m 3.
5 an important conversation to begin stars All of us have been hurt by strangers and loved ones alike These hurts take up a disproportionate amount of our interior lives and are sometimes the cause of dysfunctional ways of being in the world, in our relationships and with ourselves Dr Lerner begins a very important conversation about the nature of hurt, betrayals, apologies and forgiveness She bitten off a huge topic and in a pleasant and vaguely helpful way discusses the nature of the above with research, clinical examples and her own lived experience The writing is accessible and interesting but she fails to delve into any of the above with the gusto and detail that I craved This is neither clinical manual nor self help book but rather a meandering albeit wise tome that weaves in and out with insight and keen observations This is the kind of book that you may need to read two or

5 stars Harriet Lerner s latest book is filled with points on apology the bogus apology, the overlong apology, holding off on the use of BUT and IF which are dealbreakers, and when and how to give and accept an olive branch Earnest, honest considerate apologies retain connection in relationships, demonstrate respect and maturely express accountability And most people have a hard time letting go to offer an apology Lerner covers that and in her very informative book I was hoping to find something a bit different than that, wise advice that it is And eventually, on page 143 of this 190 page guide, I did, plus I m an apologizer, an anomaly in my original family It was a family that didn t talk about the big stuff, a mom who shut down from my non apologizing father, siblings who took This book deserves 5 solid stars, and I don t give out 5 stars very often This book is invaluable to anyone who has friends and or family in their lives who lack luster in the apology department It covers both big hurts, such as deep seeded wounds of child abuse, as well as smaller offenses, such as a friend not saying thank you when you pick up the check I have people in my life who behave this way and I find it very frustrating For this reason, I decided to read the book for myself as well as a possible recommendation for my clients I don t like to recommend a book to a client if I myself haven t read it from cover to cover So there I went plowing away at this book , turning the pages and devouring the wisdom on ev Sensible, clear and wise advice, with humour and honesty throughout Just what I needed to read and think about Many clear examples and suggested scripts A balanced approach, without much of the quasi mystical gobbledy gook of many self help books on this topic.
Reading this book was kind of a wake up call for me Before I read this book, I couldn t even recall how many times in my life that I said sorry to the other people that they couldn t accept I got hurt and frustrated so often thinking that the other party did not have the willingness to fix the problems while I wanted to I would easily jump to conclusions that the other people were being difficult or they just wanted to prolong the fight The thing was that I was never aware of how insincere some of my apologies may have sounded or they actually were Which is why this book came to rescue Ever since I started reading this book, I got this conscious angel on my shoulder warning me all the signs of making faux apology This book got me to take a step back and think before I d apologize someone Am I really sorry Or do I just want to shut The Renowned Psychologist And Bestselling Author Of The Dance Of Anger, Harriet Lerner Sheds New Light On The Two Most Important Words In The English Language I M Sorry And Offers A Unique Perspective On The Challenge Of Healing Broken Relationships And Restoring TrustLerner Has Been Studying Apologies For Than Two Decades In Why Won T You Apologize She Offers Compelling Stories And Solid Theory To Demonstrate The Transformative Power Of Making Amends, And What Is Required For Healing When The Damage We Ve Inflicted Or Received Is Far From Simple Readers Will Learn How To Craft A Meaningful Apology And Avoid Signals Of Insincerity That Only Deepen SufferingIn Why Won T You Apologize Lerner Challenges The Popular Notion That Forgiveness Is The Only Path To Peace Of Mind And Helps Those Who Have Been Injured To Resist Pressure To Forgive Too Easily She Explains What Drives Both The Non Apologizer And The Over Apologizer, And Why The People Who Do The Worst Things Are The Least Able To Own Their Misdeeds With Her Trademark Humour And Wit, Lerner Offers A Joyful And Sanity Saving Guide To Setting Things Right Go read this now It will make you a better person And then you ll give it to someone else to make them a better person.
Super helpful and lots of examples She mentions other cultures views on apologies but then re centres one view and I wish there was a bit space left for the former But still, worth reading

Dr Harriet Lerner, Ph.D Clinical Psychology, City University of New York M.A Educational Psychology, Columbia University Teachers College , was born and raised in Brooklyn, New York, the second of two daughters Her parents, Archie and Rose Goldhor, were both children of Russian Jewish immigrant parents They were high school graduates who wanted their daughters to be someone at a time when